There’s that moment when you wake up, get ready for work and ask yourself, “Is this really it? How many more years do I have to keep this job going? “How am I going to make it?” But then you hear those familiar voices in your head: “I can’t quit. It’s no better elsewhere. It’s too late for a change. And besides, “I’m not good enough to take the risk, am I?” Welcome to the world of blocks, fears and doubts – the master class in self-sabotage.
Many of the women I support in my coaching sessions are stuck right here. They have a desire for change, they sense the potential, but it seems as if someone has pressed the pause button on their life.
“Now is not the right time,” you hear. “I have to…” and the list of excuses goes on and on. The good news? That moment never comes – if you wait for it. But I say: go for it anyway. You can prepare for the change, even if it doesn’t seem possible at the moment.
These are the five most important steps to get your career restart on track:
1. the art of reframing: give your job a new framework
Admittedly, your current job feels like a dusty, ugly picture that’s been hanging in your mental living room for far too long. You just want to take it down, but there are those little details that are getting in the way: the salary, the security, the comfort. This is where the art of reframing comes in.
What if we gave this old picture a new frame? Maybe not forever, but for a while until you are ready to hang up the perfect new picture? Reframing means changing your perspective. Look at your job with different eyes. Not as a burden, but as a financial anchor that gives you the freedom to look for new opportunities in peace.
Your job becomes a means to an end – your new purpose. Use this time to invest specifically in your preparation. Start strengthening yourself from the inside out while you set the course on the outside.
2. the search behind the scenes: Your secret plan
While you give your job a temporary raison d’être, you can set the stage for your change in the background. Here, it’s crucial to find allies who will really help you put your plans into action. But be careful: only involve those who support your motivation and goals and don’t hold you back with their own fears and doubts. I have accompanied many of my clients through precisely these phases – and we often find that the biggest critics are not strangers, but close confidants who are stuck in their own comfort zone. So surround yourself with people who encourage you and listen to those who can honestly help you without reinforcing your doubts.
While you strengthen yourself mentally, you work specifically on your plan B. What alternatives are there? What further training could you do? Which networks do you need to activate in order to be in the right places? Step by step, you prepare yourself mentally and practically for the changeover, without the pressure of having to jump immediately.
3. use fears and doubts as a guide
Now to the nasty fellows that hold us all back: Fears and doubts. Maybe you’ve been there: you make a list of everything that could go wrong and after ten minutes your list is the length of a novel. Perfect! Because now you have a checklist of all the things you can prepare for.
Every fear and doubt that arises in you shows you something that you can think through and prepare for. Afraid of financial uncertainty? Create a budget that gives you at least six months breathing space. Doubts about your skills? Find training courses or mentors to help you progress. Fear is not a stop sign, but a signpost.
4. take away the power of excuses
“It’s no better anywhere else.” – I hear that all the time. But I ask myself: how do you know that? Have you tried it out? Informed yourself? Looked through the job offers and talked to people in other professions? Most of the time, these are just excuses that we tell ourselves because we are afraid of the new. But new things are exactly what we need to grow.
Change always feels scary because it’s unfamiliar. But if you’re honest with yourself, how did your current job feel on the first day? Exactly, not any better. It’s time to take the risk – well prepared, of course, and step by step.
5. replace the old image: Your path to the future
Well, the moment will come when you are ready to take down the old picture and hang up the new one. By then, you will have prepared yourself mentally and practically, strengthened yourself and explored your options. You’ll approach the change with clarity and a plan instead of acting hastily and in panic.
And honestly? If you take this step, you’ll be surprised how much better it feels than you could ever have imagined. Because what is still holding you back is not external circumstances, but internal blockages – and you can change them.
My 10 impulses for more self-empowerment will also help you with these inner blockages; you can download them from my website.
These impulses will help you discover your inner strength and take the steps towards change with more self-confidence and clarity. You have everything you need to plan and implement your new career start. No matter how big the doubts are, how many obstacles arise – you are stronger than you think.
Every little step forward brings you closer to your goal. So stop hiding, stop putting your dreams off until later. You deserve to work in a job that fulfills and inspires you. You can do it – so start walking your path!
About the author: Sabine Buiten
Sabine Buiten stands for women’s self-empowerment. As a qualified life and social counselor, systemic coach and mental trainer, she supports women in freeing themselves from stagnation and the feeling of perseverance in both their professional and private lives. With a great deal of empathy and practical experience, she helps them to overcome their own barriers and approach change with confidence. In her private life, she lives in Vienna, is happily married in her second marriage, is the proud mother of a grown-up daughter and shares her home with three cats.
About the author
Ich bin Sabine Buiten, Selbstermächtigungskomplizin für Frauen. Als diplomierte Lebens- und Sozialberaterin, systemische Coachin und Mentaltrainerin unterstütze ich Frauen dabei, aus der Starre auszubrechen und ihre persönliche und berufliche Entwicklung voranzutreiben.
Mit über 30 Jahren Erfahrung im Finanz- und Wirtschaftsbereich, einschließlich Führungspositionen, kenne ich die Herausforderungen, die viele Frauen davon abhalten, ins Handeln zu kommen. Mein Ziel ist es, ihnen zu helfen, selbstbewusste Schritte in Richtung Veränderung zu finden und Unsicherheiten zu überwinden.
Ich habe ein unternehmensinternes Frauennetzwerk mitbegründet, das Frauen unabhängig von ihrer Position oder Abteilung stärkt und unterstützt. Als Frau, Unternehmerin, Mutter und (Ex-)Partnerin habe ich selbst erlebt, wie wichtig Selbstbestimmtheit und innere Stärke sind.
In meiner zweiten Ehe bin ich (meistens) glücklich verheiratet, stolze Mama einer erwachsenen Tochter und teile mein Wiener Zuhause mit drei Katzen, die mein Leben mit Chaos und Lachen bereichern.
